The world is still in shock over the suicides of celebrity chef, Anthony Bourdain, and handbag designer, Kate Spade. Both of whom, are celebrated success stories who have left their marks on American culture. Now, their unexpected deaths have drawn attention to mental heath. How is it possible that two people, who have obtained the ‘American Dream’ in their own rights, decided to end their own life?
The public shock highlights the little understanding we continue to have for depression and mental health. There tends to be a popular assumption that depression is a sadness that isn’t quite compatible with attributes such as success, wealth, and attractiveness. It’s almost as if, people who achieve great success, people like Anthony Bourdain or Kate Spade, don’t have a justifiable reason to have depression or commit suicide.
During an episode of ‘Parts Unknown’ in Argentina, Anthony Bourdain shared his challenges with depression.
‘Things have been happening, I will find myself in an airport for instance and I’ll order a airport hamburger. It’s an insignificant thing, it’s a small thing, it’s a hamburger, but it’s not a good one.
‘Suddenly I look at the hamburger and I find myself in a spiral of depression that can last for days.’
In this short, seemingly unimportant statement, Bourdain shed light on the irrationality of depression.
Depression is an illness that follows no rationale.
Mental health illnesses don’t care if you’re rich, successful, or attractive. They don’t care if you’re an internationally acclaimed chef or handbag designer. They don’t care if you’re a medical student with exams coming up or a mother working a full time job. Simply put, anyone can become a victim of depression.
Depression lurks in everyone’s shadows. It’s often tricky to discern, since on first glance it seems like ‘sadness’ – a standard human emotion. However, it can gather traction from genetic dispositions towards depression or from the accumulation of life difficulties and stressful events. It claims your mind little by little, slowly enough that you don’t notice it creeping in. Then all of a sudden, you’re drowning in a sadness that you can’t comprehend. You don’t understand where it came from and you don’t understand why it’s here. One moment you could be having a decent day, and the next moment you’re spiraling down a dark hole of heavy sadness.
While reading articles about the suicides of Kate Spade and Anthony Bourdain, I feel in their pain and suffering. Their deaths bring me back to days of my depression, to the lowest moments of my life. Depression has an ugly way of ridding you of any hope and happiness. It immunes you from daily joys and makes you forget about all you have to be thankful for in life. With depression, you are surviving; not living. Suicide victims deserve our respect and compassion. A decision to commit suicide does not come before incredible suffering and a strenuous fight against sadness.
As much as I am glad that a public discussion on mental heath has been reignited, it’s important to realize that depression and suicides have always been present in our society. As celebrity deaths happen, more and more people are inclined to join the mental health conversation. These conversations pop up on our social media timelines and news outlets. At the very least, they force us to acknowledge the uncomfortable topic of mental health and challenge its stigma.
Celebrity suicides are clear indication that no one is immune to depression and we must be aware of the likelihood that one of our friends or loved ones is suffering too. Depression can be awkward to address and many of us don’t know how to go about it. However, helping someone we care about doesn’t require us to be medical professions. The simply acts of showing concern and compassion go a long way.
(For a more in depth guide on how to help someone with depression click here.)